Melissa is currently training
to become a certified
Narcissistic Abuse Treatment Clinician (NATC)
with Dr. Ramani Durvasula,
the world's leading narcissism expert
and New York Times bestselling author of
It's Not You: Identifying and Healing from Narcissistic People.
Empathy and sensitivity,
two of your most beautiful traits,
render you vulnerable to the emotional abuse of narcissistic relationships.
If this has been your experience, you are not alone.
And there is nothing wrong with you.
The problem is the behavior of someone with a narcissistic personality style.
Within the transformative coaching partnership,
you will be guided to heal
from these toxic dynamics whether they be past, present or both.
Paramount to the future,
you are now empowered to discern narcissism
and quickly spot "red flags."
These include the silent treatment, future faking,
bread crumbing, baiting, gaslighting,
love bombing, trauma bonding, blame shifting, word salad,
circular conversations, hoovering,
devaluation, walking on eggshells,
DIMMER (dismissive, invalidating, minimizing, manipulative, entitled, rage)
and flying monkeys.
Moving forward,
you are safeguarded against becoming entangled
and stuck with partners (or dynamics)
that are not good for you.
On a foundation of unconditional self-love,
you will now create relationships characterized
by empathy, respect,
safety, kindness, laughter,
reciprocity, growth, sustained mutual cherishing,
deep connection, evolving best friendship,
the sharing of love
and so much more.
At last, you are safe to shine your light and be you.
And your empathy becomes a superpower.
My Story
The scene: A dimly lit psychotherapist's office in Manhattan's West Village.
As a New York University graduate student, training to be a psychotherapist, I am wiping away tears and deeply confused.
Despite trying very hard to do everything "right," I feel anxious and depressed.
The relationship with a loving and empathic man (the partnership that means everything to me) remains elusive.
"What am I doing wrong?"
My therapist leans toward me thoughtfully.
"Before you fall in love with him, Melissa, you must fall in love with yourself."
I nod in agreement and disappear onto Prince Street feeling even more disconnected from myself, and a spiritual source of unconditional love, than ever before.
I have no idea how to love myself.
It would be years (and a Dark Night of the Soul) before I understood what was actually happening.
As a chronically self-abandoning empath, I was indeed suffering from a lack of self-love as well as the fallout of narcissistic abuse.
Today, in my worldwide private practice featuring Conscious Uncoupling and Calling in "The One," I specialize in working with empathic and highly sensitive people seeking to heal from narcissistic abuse and master self-love.
I look forward to hearing your story and showing you how.
"Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could all be a little more gentle with each other, and a little more loving, have a little more empathy and maybe we'd like each other a little bit more."
~Judy Garland
bluebirdsflycoaching.com
